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The Worst Summer Blockbusters of All Time [VIDEO]

The summer of 2012 has already seen its share of summer blockbusters. Starting off with “The Hunger Games“, and “The Avengers“, and finishing off in a couple of weeks with Spiderman reboot, “The Amazing Spiderman” and the end of Christopher Nolan’s Batman Trilogy, “The Dark Knight Rises.”  Though just because  summer blockbusters are genetically engineered to create the kind of excitment that causes moviegoers to flock to theaters, that doesn’t mean they’re all good…

Sometimes they’re great like 2008′s “The Dark Knight”, and actually manage to elevate the form of popcorn movies. Sometimes they’re an orgy of terrible acting and special effects for special effects sake, made to bleed money out of consumers because of their enduring love for a recognizable franchise. In that vain we’ve compiled a list of what we consider to be, the worst of the worst.

“Green Lantern”

 

This is one of those movies  in which the bad far outweighs the good.  A confusing script, CGI that looks as if it’s ripped from an XBOX game, and Blake Lively’s heavily made-up face doing all of the acting for her.  But its worst feature was that of a superhero being played by Ryan Reynolds whose only acting technique is to pretend that he’s too cool to be there.  This made me lose faith in all superhero movies <i>not</i> directed by Christopher Nolan

“Catwoman”

 

Girl works at cosmetics company.  Girl gets killed.  Girl is brought back to life by a bunch of Egyptian cats.  Girl wears dominatrix costume.  Girl kills Sharon Stone.  Sounds like a terrible mad-lib more than a movie to me.  Sadly, that’s not the case, and a leather-clad Halle Berry was unleashed unto us all.

“Spiderman 3″

 

Looking even more like Hillary Swank than he normally does a skinny jeans wearing hipster  Tobey McGuire managed to ruin the last movie in this legendary trilogy.  Besides McGuire’s distracting performance and outfits, were what felt like at least twenty villains, none of which had enough screen time to actually make a connection with the audience.  All in all, it was pretty maddening.

“Star Wars: Episode 1-The Phantom Menace”

 

Three words: Jar Jar Binks.  I will forever hold a grudge against George Lucas for not leaving well enough alone.

“Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen”

 

I think it’s safe to say that Michael Bay shouldn’t be allowed to make any more movies.  Revoke his directing license if you have to.  Sure, that’s not a thing, but maybe we should print him one just so we can take it away.  This movie is the perfect example of special effects porn, that its plot is indecipherable.  Also, does anyone really buy Shia LaBeouf as a leading man?

 

 

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